You will see a number at the end of the URL if you look at your profile on FetLife. Since far as i will inform it represents the sequential amount of the most recent user (you!) at that time you joined. My FetLife Address is indeed that suggests I ended up being the 9,472nd individual to join through to FetLife. Therefore I’ve been on the website awhile and I’ve viewed it develop and evolve over the period.
Among the cool media that are social features FetLife has may be the power to add buddies.
They show up on your profile using your buddies list and, more to the point, you get to see any activity of theirs within the “FetLife” feed whenever you sign on. Thus giving you a simple method of seeing exacltly what the friends are up to, anything brand brand brand new they’ve published or subjects they’re talking about. a great method to meet up with what’s happening or perhaps having a voyeuristic appearance about what folks are as much as. This brings me personally to at least one specially troubling problem we have actually with FetLife; possibly this can be more to do with perceived FetLife “protocol” if you certainly will. It’s the phantom friend add.
It’s constantly a surprise that is pleasant you sign in and discover an innovative new buddy demand or brand new mail or even a notification that someone has discovered something you posted was kinda cool. Unfortuitously nearly all “Friend adds” i’ve received within the couple that is last of are only that; buddy adds. We don’t understand whom the individual is, We have no basic concept the way they have actually run into my profile or why they made a decision to include me personally. We have nothing, nada, zip, zilch, zero, nowt to take. This might be irritating in my situation as my profile politely asks individuals to simply drop me personally an agreeable note presenting by themselves or telling me personally why they included me personally. A“ that is simple desire to see your updates” or “picture X ended up being kinda cool” or “we have x “fetishes” in keeping” is sufficient; I’m maybe maybe perhaps not expecting an essay. I actually do expect one thing coherent but (The message that is best i obtained protecting an add is “Hi Malta right right right here”… seriously?). We think it is actually strange that folks just add others and randomly expect them to accept it. Many people are various and you will find those who are content to just accept any demands tossed at them and that’s reasonable sufficient. I state within my profile I’d like simply a little note with any adds and also this appears to be a lot of for 90percent associated with adds I have (the amount is most likely more than that). The thing I have always been seeing is the fact that individuals have not really been bothered to see my profile (so just why would they bother to incorporate me personally). Very strange. Being a apart, any individual who we have actually perhaps maybe maybe not met in RL that I’ve included We have ALWAYS sent an intro message commenting on some aspect of the profile and exactly why I’d prefer to be added as a buddy. Takes 30 seconds and constantly is apparently valued. Simple.
Could it be unreasonable to anticipate individuals to try this? Exactly what are you experiences with phantom adds?
What exactly are you experiences with FetLife in general? Does anybody have recommendations, experiences or suggestions about just how to utilize the site to share with you? I’d want to here feedback on this.
FetLife is definitely a tool that is amazing I’m happy it’s grown in the 
manner it has. It’s clearly taken care of by those who worry they do about it and are good at what. We have always discovered the moderators and “staff” that I’ve managed to be prompt and conscious. I’ve made some connections that are interesting discovered a lot through the different discussion boards I be involved in (i will be mostly a lurker i need to acknowledge).